The Ins and Outs of Apologizing, with a Staff Hovering Near.

What is it about one little woman, and one big stick that can put the fear into a grown man? Maybe, it is because that little woman, is wiser than all of us put together. That, and the damn stick hurts!


And there she was, leaning on that staff as if she were guarding the entire camp from me and my folly. Or that is how I felt at the moment. How is it that I always feel like a chastened boy when I come in contact with this woman? Like one that needs to confess to sins that he had not even committed, simply because she wanted such? The fact that she immediately removed Fonce from every thing, almost made me bolt and run. But the fact that he quietly went and sat on the furs she indicated, did have its' own amusement. But I only had a moment to reflect on that before she turned her attentions back to me.


I knew I was in trouble when she addressed me as.......Ubar. Not good, not good at all. Twice she did this. Can we say.........fear? I knew at that moment, this was not an easy task that I was working on, but it was an important one. And in that realization, I knew that the best thing for me to do was be honest, and I was.


I told Oren that I needed to speak to Seveya about trust. She seemed to understand this, even agreed with it, and even called me by my name! Maybe I would survive this yet.


Oren called Seveya out, told her that I wanted to talk to her, and to come listen, and if she didn't like what I had to say, she could march right back inside the wagon.


The first thing that hit me was her face, and the anger bubbled up inside me, and I had to push it back down. I have seen the results of beatings, and I have seen slaves that had been beaten, but what that man had done to her was beyond the pale. Beyond anything that might have been necessary. At that moment, I think somewhere inside of me, made the decision to have him dealt with, but not now. Right now it would have just added more fuel to this fire that I was trying to stamp out.


Seveya was not pleased to see me, you could tell that by her body language. And in all honesty, it confused me, but I would later learn why she was more than reticent to speak to me. It had more to do with Fonce, and how I had treated him, than it had to do with her. I was saved by Oren, who encouraged her to sit on the steps and talk. Skies bless the little woman.


Suffice to say, I was not quite finished with making mistakes. The fact that Seveya had not come to me before she had made such a rash decision, still bothered me. Am I not a fair man? A man that wants only good for those around him? My next mistake was in mentioning this to Seveya, and her responsibility to do that very thing.


Damn that staff hurts!


After a verbal lesson on how to apologize, I tried to made Oren understand that I really was trying here. And not only to protect my shins, but to get across that I was sincere, even if I was flawed. A woman understands that right? A flawed man. In fact, I think they like us that way just a little. Those bony fingers began to beat a tattoo on my chest, and I did the very first thing that came to my head. I took that gnarled hand in mine, kissed the fingers and asked her to please hear me out.


It worked!


I was allowed to continue to speak with the young artisan, in hopes to make her understand how much I wanted this all put aside, and for her to be safe. And, that there was no way that I would have allowed a woman of the First Fires to be bargained away to one of the outer wagons. When she mentioned that I did know, I was shocked. I did? She said that Karvek had mentioned it, but I'll be damned if I remembered it.


I may have been dead in the water there, had not Oren stepped in and asked if Mezoo had been there at the time. Well, I didn't remember it happening, so how did I know if Mezoo had been there or not? Seveya stepped in to toss me a life line, by saying that yes, Mezoo had been present. I had to admit, that I was often distracted when the little spex was there. And you know, they forgave me for it.


I went on to explain to Seveya that I wanted her back at the First Fires as a free woman of the Tuchuk. I just could not see her on her knees to any man, I had far too much respect for her to see that, and I feel that she has too much to offer her people as a woman that is free, than as a slave. It was all true. She had faltered, but don't we all? It was now time to put her back in her proper place, and to stand behind her, protect her and to support her.


She accepted my apology, then began to trim my ears over my treatment of Fonce. What? I am going to pat myself on the back here. I accepted the dressing down, because was this not what I wanted....for her to be a free woman, and to have the ability to express her opinions? It is that double edged sword thing, I think.


I had to explain to her, that even though I had made my mistakes in all of this, that there was not a man in this camp that I trusted or respected more than Fonce. It worked. Maybe it worked because it was the truth, and I find that if you speak the truth, it is always better.